#KNOWN DONOR FREE#

I don't plan to have a big family and I am very open to fostering half-sibling relationships.Egg donors are selected by reviewing an on-line bank of donors. There is also an unofficial Xytex families group on Facebook. They have Xyconnects platform that connect RPs together and I've heard the donor choses to connect some of the time which opens contact before 18.

#KNOWN DONOR FREE#

If you are US based, you get 1 year of free storage if you buy 4+ vials. They do have Xylimited donor with smaller family units. I appreciate that they follow the 25 family unit limit, although my donor ended the program early and likely has less than that.

They are pretty responsive e-mail wise as well. The actual buying and storage process was literally a click of a button.

I also cross referenced my genetic testing with his. He wrote a very non-generic heartfelt essay and that sold me. I got 12 photos of my donor from infant to adulthood. I surfed quite a few banks (I think I had 3-4 that were 'Canadian certified') but only Xytex provided enough information for me to feel settled with. I am outside of the US and even then the process was easy. We're just both so incapable of even feigning sexual interest in each other that I genuinely don't think either of us has ever bothered to consider if the other might be attractive lol. Not that he's hard to look at, I suppose, his husband likes him well enough, anyway. I didn't really consider his looks when I asked him, though. I asked him over other friends because he's smart, kind, and funny, and I'm crossing my fingers that he manages to pass on some sort of Math Gene, because any offspring I have certainly won't be getting that one from me. Going through a clinic here also means that they're legally required to give him an STD panel and inform me of anything that would be a risk for me/baby before they can perform the procedure (which he would've done himself anyway even if it wasn't required), which means I'll still be spending a little over $2k if his insurance doesn't cover it. We don't have to worry about him having parental rights or responsibilities, because in our state a child conceived via AI is considered to have no legal father as long as the donation and insemination are done in a clinic, and he'll have to sign legal documents acknowledging that he understands that. He's also agreed to donating again in the future if I wanted to have more children.

A few of his close family members want to have a familial relationship with my child (emotionally, not legally), which both Donor and I are fine with because they're great people, very respectful of our choices, and I've always been a 'more the merrier' type. They're looking forward to just being uncles though, because 'it's all the fun with none of the responsibility' lol. Partly due to wanting to do IUI instead of regular AI, partly because it'll save me a good amount of money that I can put towards the baby, and partly so that my child will have that connection with the other half of themself.ĭonor and I have been best friends for almost a decade, and he and his husband are childfree by choice, so I'm not worried about them wanting to be parents, but we've talked about what we'd want to do if their feelings changed. I'm going with a known donor, but the insemination will take place in a clinic, so sort of a middle ground I guess. I took time to get to know my donor as a person and really respect and like him. I personally did not like the idea of not knowing where half her DNA came from. I have heard of success stories when friends help friends but I'd 100% recommend really going into it with very clear expectations and do counselling together.Įdit to say - a known donor was personally important to me as a single mum since she will only have one parent. We did counselling sessions before even trying to make sure we were on the same page and to have a 3rd party written document of our intentions. My donor and I have a good relationship now and he will be known to my daughter but he is not her dad and that line will never be blurred. I think it's way to easy to blur the lines. In saying that, I'm not sure I'd want to use someone who I had a previous close relationship with. It took me a while to get a sticky baby and in that time him and I have become friends. He's a great guy and has only donated to one other person and does not plan to do anymore. I have used a known donor and am so happy that I did so.

Known donor